Thursday, January 16, 2020
Parashat Shmot: I will be what I will be
Eheyeh asher Eheyeh. I will be what I will be. This is how God tells Moshe to introduce Him to the people of Israel this week.
This name of God reminds me of the song:
Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future’s not ours to see
Que sera, sera
The implication of “I will be what I will be” is that God does what He does and human beings can’t predict it or fathom it. God and His will are beyond us. It seems to us that Egyptian enslavement is a mistake, a terrible tragedy, but God will be what He will be, and it is not really ours to understand it.
The appropriate reaction to this is total surrender of one’s will to God’s will, admitting that we do not really control things, letting go and joining the flow and the will of God’s plan.
There is freedom in this relinquishment of control, and there is a kind of peace and relaxation as we admit that the world is beyond us.
But there can also be a lot of anxiety. If God simply is what He is, without any relation to us, then we are left unsteady and groundless; our lives are unpredictable and we have no one to rely on.
And so the parsha also offers another interpretation of the word Eheyeh. Moshe struggles with taking on his mission. He doubts he is capable. So God says to him: Ki Eheyeh imakh. “But I will be with you.” In this topsy turvy unpredictable world, I will be what I will be and you won’t understand it, but you should still know one thing --- I will always be with you.
There is no other ground. This is the only ground we can walk on. It does feel to us that things are unsteady and unpredictable, and God is what He is and does what He does without explanation. But in spite of this, there is a quality of being that we can rely on, that will never leave us, that is as strong as a rock, as spacious as the sky and as permanent as eternity. It is God’s Presence with us, inside us, wherever we go, whatever happens. Ki Eheyeh Imakh. For I will be with you.
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. . from Atlanta to Hyderabad. May you continue to feel his presence.
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